Tuesday, 11 March 2014

Cruel Losses

First of all I would like to extend my sincerest condolences to the family of Aj Hayes who died this weekend. He was a regular commenter here and I’ll miss his friendship as much as his support and advice. He was a true gent whose comments gave me the confidence to share my work. It feels decidely odd posting a piece knowing that one of his supportive and insightful comments won't be forthcoming. 

This is a little piece I wrote as an exercise during Crime and Publishment. During his session “Dicing with Dialogue” Michael Malone gave us some scenarios and I chose the following one. 

-          a mother who has just miscarried and her four year-old who wants a baby sister. 

The scenario is deeply personal for me and as I was writing it, I twice had to leave the room. However I don’t believe in shying away from tough writing. Anyway, after a little tightening up here is the piece I wrote.
‘What’s wrong Mummy?’
‘It’s what?’ Jordan’s foot stamped down ‘I want to meet my sister.’
Karen’s lip quivered as her head bowed down.
‘Mummy? Don’t cry Mummy.’
Jordan…I’m afraid…’
‘Don’t be afraid Mummy. Baby will be here soon and then I’ll have my sister.’
Karen said nothing. Preferring instead to draw solace and strength from Jordan’s sticky fingers as they grasped her thumb.
‘Can we call the baby Alice? I think Alice would be a good name for baby.’
‘I’m sorry darling. So sorry.’ A gulp was followed by a tearful swallow. ‘Baby won’t be coming.’
‘Baby has… baby has decided to go to heaven instead. Baby wanted to meet the angels.’
‘Like Daddy?’
‘Yes…Just like Daddy.’